Hi,
One more...
Here's the exemplar answer we worked on in class on Tuesday:
Compare the ways in which poets present feelings of loss in 'On a Portrait of a Deaf Man' and one other poem.
In On a Portrait of a Deaf Man, the speaker is mourning the loss of a loved one (probably a father) and is experiencing feelings of anger and horror about death. In contrast, in Casehistory Alison, the speaker is mourning the loss of her own past life and memories following an accident. Her inability to remember means that she 'cannot get over' it, but Alison seems resigned rather than angry.
In Portrait of a Deaf Man, the speaker experiences sharply contrasting emotions. On the one hand, the portrait of his father brings back fond memories. He mentions small details that bring his father to life, from his 'kind old face' and 'egg-shaped head' to his 'discreetly loud' tie. These fond memories use synecdoche to start to put together a sense of who he was. However, each of these details has darker connotations. The egg image implies fragility, and the oxymoron of 'discreetly loud' represents the mixed feelings which run throughout the poem. Each detail from the past links to a morbid thought about the present: his fondness for 'potatoes in their skin' is a reminder of the man's skin now - and his position in the earth. Later, the reference to shaking hands links to a grim thought about how 'his finger bones stick through his finger ends'. The poet's main point seems to be that fond memories have been tainted with the horrid realisation of death.
Similarly, in Casehistory Alison, there is a sense of pride and fondness when focusing on the past contrasted with a sense of shame and despair about her transformation. In fact, the contrast is so sharp that Fanthorpe presents Alice in both the 1st and 3rd person, describing her as 'My husband's wife, my mother's only daughter'. This immediately creates an identity crisis; the old Alison and the new Alison are like different people. This is developed with a series of contrasting descriptions. In the past, Alison had 'delicate angles' and 'airy poise' like a 'Degas dancer.' These descriptions create an image of grace and beauty, like a work of art. The 'autocratic knee' also depicts the old Alison as being powerful and in control. The new Alison couldn' be more different; she is 'enmeshed in ... fat' and that same knee now 'lugs' her upstairs. The word 'enmeshed' has connotations of entrapment, suggesting she feels trapped in this new life, mind and body. The use of the heavy sounding 'lug' sharply contrasts to her 'airy poise' in the past. Later in the poem, we learn of other things she has lost: her old 'lack of faith' and her 'smiles' - even after her father's death. Her head injury means she has to suffer grief over and over again, and the 'lack of faith' implies that her old carefree attitude has gone forever.
The structure of these two poems is very different and shows the different mindsets of the speakers. On a Portrait of a Deaf Man is fairly regular, with an abcb rhyme scheme and regular stanza lengths. This helps create a sense of order and certainty which fits with the speaker's blunt, direct assessment of the reality of life and death. The rhymes often make this blunt truth all the more horrific as they are completed at the end of each stanza, many of which end with an image of horror. In contrast, the three lines stanzas and enjambment in Casehistory Alison help recreate the irregular, uncertain nature of her new life. The splitting of phrases using enjambment (eg. 'lugs me upstairs/Hardly') suggests that she is always trying to catch up with herself, and that thinks never quite fit together as they should. The short, long, short pattern in terms of stanza lengths creates a sense of a repetitive cycle - much like her existence now that she needs 'reminding every morning.' Although there is little rhyme, clusters of repeated words and phrases help create pathos: 'morning' comes in close proximity with its homophone 'mourning', emphasising the repeated sense of loss. Other repetitions (smiles, faith) emphasise the sense of there being two Alisons.
Finally, Casehistory Alison ends with more repetition as 'a bright girl she was' is repeated. At the end however, there is more pathos as it is juxtaposed with the tragedy of the previous line: 'I am her future'. 'Was' seems like the perfect word to end the poem with, as it suggests that her old life is well and truly consigned to the past and can never be recovered. Portrait of a Deaf Man ends in anger - at God. The address to God and the capitalisation of His name suggests a continuing belief, but the accusation suggests a crisis of faith. The final word emphasises the bleak reality of the constant presence of 'decay' and death. Perhaps the speaker's horror is as much about his own decay as it is about the loss of his father; losing a loved one has made him discover the truth of his own mortality.
As you can see girls, you can't write about everything in 45 minutes. You don't have to. Just use the structure we discussed today and stay focused and you'll be fine.
Best of luck,
Mr M
One more...
Here's the exemplar answer we worked on in class on Tuesday:
Compare the ways in which poets present feelings of loss in 'On a Portrait of a Deaf Man' and one other poem.
In On a Portrait of a Deaf Man, the speaker is mourning the loss of a loved one (probably a father) and is experiencing feelings of anger and horror about death. In contrast, in Casehistory Alison, the speaker is mourning the loss of her own past life and memories following an accident. Her inability to remember means that she 'cannot get over' it, but Alison seems resigned rather than angry.
In Portrait of a Deaf Man, the speaker experiences sharply contrasting emotions. On the one hand, the portrait of his father brings back fond memories. He mentions small details that bring his father to life, from his 'kind old face' and 'egg-shaped head' to his 'discreetly loud' tie. These fond memories use synecdoche to start to put together a sense of who he was. However, each of these details has darker connotations. The egg image implies fragility, and the oxymoron of 'discreetly loud' represents the mixed feelings which run throughout the poem. Each detail from the past links to a morbid thought about the present: his fondness for 'potatoes in their skin' is a reminder of the man's skin now - and his position in the earth. Later, the reference to shaking hands links to a grim thought about how 'his finger bones stick through his finger ends'. The poet's main point seems to be that fond memories have been tainted with the horrid realisation of death.
Similarly, in Casehistory Alison, there is a sense of pride and fondness when focusing on the past contrasted with a sense of shame and despair about her transformation. In fact, the contrast is so sharp that Fanthorpe presents Alice in both the 1st and 3rd person, describing her as 'My husband's wife, my mother's only daughter'. This immediately creates an identity crisis; the old Alison and the new Alison are like different people. This is developed with a series of contrasting descriptions. In the past, Alison had 'delicate angles' and 'airy poise' like a 'Degas dancer.' These descriptions create an image of grace and beauty, like a work of art. The 'autocratic knee' also depicts the old Alison as being powerful and in control. The new Alison couldn' be more different; she is 'enmeshed in ... fat' and that same knee now 'lugs' her upstairs. The word 'enmeshed' has connotations of entrapment, suggesting she feels trapped in this new life, mind and body. The use of the heavy sounding 'lug' sharply contrasts to her 'airy poise' in the past. Later in the poem, we learn of other things she has lost: her old 'lack of faith' and her 'smiles' - even after her father's death. Her head injury means she has to suffer grief over and over again, and the 'lack of faith' implies that her old carefree attitude has gone forever.
The structure of these two poems is very different and shows the different mindsets of the speakers. On a Portrait of a Deaf Man is fairly regular, with an abcb rhyme scheme and regular stanza lengths. This helps create a sense of order and certainty which fits with the speaker's blunt, direct assessment of the reality of life and death. The rhymes often make this blunt truth all the more horrific as they are completed at the end of each stanza, many of which end with an image of horror. In contrast, the three lines stanzas and enjambment in Casehistory Alison help recreate the irregular, uncertain nature of her new life. The splitting of phrases using enjambment (eg. 'lugs me upstairs/Hardly') suggests that she is always trying to catch up with herself, and that thinks never quite fit together as they should. The short, long, short pattern in terms of stanza lengths creates a sense of a repetitive cycle - much like her existence now that she needs 'reminding every morning.' Although there is little rhyme, clusters of repeated words and phrases help create pathos: 'morning' comes in close proximity with its homophone 'mourning', emphasising the repeated sense of loss. Other repetitions (smiles, faith) emphasise the sense of there being two Alisons.
Finally, Casehistory Alison ends with more repetition as 'a bright girl she was' is repeated. At the end however, there is more pathos as it is juxtaposed with the tragedy of the previous line: 'I am her future'. 'Was' seems like the perfect word to end the poem with, as it suggests that her old life is well and truly consigned to the past and can never be recovered. Portrait of a Deaf Man ends in anger - at God. The address to God and the capitalisation of His name suggests a continuing belief, but the accusation suggests a crisis of faith. The final word emphasises the bleak reality of the constant presence of 'decay' and death. Perhaps the speaker's horror is as much about his own decay as it is about the loss of his father; losing a loved one has made him discover the truth of his own mortality.
As you can see girls, you can't write about everything in 45 minutes. You don't have to. Just use the structure we discussed today and stay focused and you'll be fine.
Best of luck,
Mr M
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